Adoption is not well understood in our culture. After we began adopting our children, I was always amazed at the people who would remark, “Someday maybe you’ll have your own children.” Somehow there seemed to be a dividing line between adopted families and biological families. Those that came together through adoption were not “real” families; the only “real” ones were those that had a genetic component.
What makes a family? Is it that you look like Uncle Joe or sing like Aunt Mary? Are you a “chip off the old block?” My first cousin, Jennifer, daughter of my Uncle Leif, came into our family through adoption. A total of three children are members of that family: two brothers (biological) and Jennifer (adopted). One brother moved away to another part of the state leaving Jennifer and her other brother and his wife to care for my aunt and uncle as they began to age. Then my uncle had a brain bleed and became incapacitated, eventually becoming unable to care for himself. Jennifer’s other brother was unable to handle the stress. He fled with his wife and three children to Arizona, leaving Jennifer alone to care for their father and mother. For several years, everyday, before and after her job, Jennifer would go to their house, bathe and toilet my uncle, and make sure he was cared for and comfortable. Jennifer would make sure that her parents were present at family gatherings, loading them into her car, along with my uncle’s wheel chair. When her father was dying, Jennifer whispered she would never leave him. Jennifer has taught me what it really means to be a family in difficult situations. To be For Life when it really gets tough!
So what forms a “real” family? Unconditional love, servanthood, faithfulness, selflessness; these are the marks of a “real” family. These bonds are not created through any genetic obligation, but rather through caring for and loving each other through both good times and difficult situations. So whether you are part of a biological, adoptive, or blended family, care for each other as Christ cares for you. Through His death on the cross you have become part of God’s family and have been given equal status with Christ as the Father’s adopted children.
“For He chose us in Him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in His sight. In love He predestined us to be adopted as His sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with His pleasure and will—to the praise of His glorious grace, which He has freely given us in the One He loves” Ephesians 1:4-6 NIV.