The cross has a special meaning for the Christian woman. It is a reminder of a love so great that it was willing to endure ridicule, humiliation, pain, and even death. The Cross—hanging on her bedroom wall or on a chain around her neck—reminds a Christian woman of the amazingly unselfish love of Jesus. The "look" of Jesus’ love is one of humility. The "behavior" of Jesus’ love turns away from self to others.

Not long ago, I was with my husband and several male members of my family at a restaurant. The woman who served our table was wearing a cross necklace which hung deep between her partially-exposed breasts. When the men at my table looked (believe me, it was hard not to!), what do you suppose they saw? The cross . . . or something else?

The woman who served our table most probably had no intention of being a "temptress." It is quite likely that she—like many of us—was so used to the partially-exposed look of today’s "fashionable" women that she didn’t see anything harmful about what she was wearing. Perhaps no one ever explained to her how sin distorts a man’s visual appreciation of a woman’s body. Or, perhaps, she did not understand the look and behavior of the cross and her responsibility to lead away from temptation. At that moment, the Christian men of my family were called to turn their eyes away from the woman and, instead, focus on the cross of Jesus. This meant acting like gentlemen who are respectful of women.

The world’s look and behavior of love boldly screams: "Look at me!" Everywhere a woman turns today she sees images which lead her toward selfish interests rather than the best interests of others. Be honest. What is the message of Victoria’s Secret? It is one thing for a married woman to purchase something from this store for her husband—and husband only—to see her in, but can we confidently say that’s who Victoria’s Secret is marketing to? Every time a woman walks through the check-out lane at the grocery store, she is confronted with messages that lead her toward selfish interests rather than the best interests of others. "Sexy looks for sexy women," reads one magazine cover. "How to get what you want when you want it," reads another.

God’s look and behavior of love tenderly encourages: "Look at the cross!" Every time we gaze upon the cross we are reminded of Jesus’ look and behavior of love. His look turned outward toward others. His behavior placed the well-being of others ahead of His own.

God’s Book of Love—the Bible—instructs us in the way of love. 1 Corinthians 13 is extremely helpful for men and women in a dating relationship. Pastors often speak these words to the bride and groom on the wedding day. But these words also describe the everyday look and behavior of love–a lifestyle of love! God’s kind of love can have a profound effect on what we choose to say, how we choose to act, and even what we choose to wear.